Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Randomize
