I wannas sexs uuuuu
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
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