No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
I woke up with dick mouth, a raw vagina, an empty bottle of vodka and the best man next to me. I also found my thong by the pool. Best.Wedding.Ever.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
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