your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
