I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
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