Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Randomize
