so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
Randomize
