we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!�
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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