After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize
