A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
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