Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
Randomize
