But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
As shirtless as possible
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
