so explain again why im purple
no
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
Randomize
