He is an equal opportunity slut.
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
Randomize
