i permit you to call me
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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