Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
Randomize