why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
Randomize
