is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
Randomize
