If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
I feel like a weird modern Betty Crocker. I'm icing a cake and looking at gay porn, if that's not an accurate portrayal of the 21st century idk what is.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize
