I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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