So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
okay, but you can't tell anyone. Every time he instagrams something with the caption "avocado," it means he's booty calling me. Happy?
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
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