Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
I would ride that face into the sunset
Randomize
