Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
Randomize
