I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
Last night my friend tried to make out with me in an olive garden. Ahahah
Nothing says 'I love you' like never ending salad and breadsticks
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
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