This is not my ceiling
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
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