Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
What did we do last night that was yellow?
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
