Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
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