More tranny stories later!
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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