People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
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