If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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