I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
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