The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK?
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
I don't deserve a penis
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize
