HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
