white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
I see more hoeing in ur future
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