I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
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