Grow some girl-balls and come out already
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
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