If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
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