i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
Randomize
