That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
Randomize
