remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
Randomize
