jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
Randomize
