the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
Randomize
