Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
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