i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
Randomize
