im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize
