The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
Sorry my hands just texted you
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
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