he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
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