Dual....:-)
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
Crap I still need to get you a wedding gift. I'm just gonna give you a bag full of cash, lube, and condoms. And I'll use furry handcuffs instead of ribbon to tie the gift bag handles together.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
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