worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
two words: eviction party
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
Randomize
