I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
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